[It dawns on him all at once, that Aubrey finally understands something no one else has ever been able to understand. Sunny and Basil share something that no one else shares, but Sunny can explain now, in ways - in ways - how it feels...]
I want to be with him.
K-kel too, but...
[He only grips Aubrey tighter.]
I can't...I can't... [Not now. Maybe not ever.] Just you...
[In ways, she can understand. However he hurt Mari, how he might hurt Basil—in anger; a mistake; he loves them. He loves them, and it’s harder for that.
[He’s not talking with Kel. Basil is… Basil. Any issues they have with that, they can take it to Aubrey....
[It's a kindness. Sunny has long hated feeling spoken for, but this is different. For four years, who spoke for Sunny when he couldn't speak for himself? Maybe he owes Kel and Basil a conversation; maybe he's angry, hurt, and scared. Maybe he doesn't owe anyone anything. Maybe it's alright to be selfish...
[Sunny's mind is ever at war with itself. It's hard to know what's real, right, or wrong when you have no idea who you are or why it matters.
[Aubrey can talk to them; it's that or silence...
[He can't bear to so much as give her words to deliver. He merely nods, still clinging with all his meager strength.]
[Sunny has told her more than anyone should ever have to. Aubrey’s never had a problem speaking; found it too easy, if anything. But she can be careful with Sunny— maybe too careful—a knife gleaming in a sliver of moonlight, feet on the edge of a roof—
[It’s done. Aubrey’s a fool if she thinks she can control what he does, any of them; she only needs to be there before it gnaws him apart.
[She carries him. Doesn’t push. Somehow, that’s been enough.
[Lightly, Aubrey rests her chin over Sunny’s head, curling ever-protectively around him. His food’s cold; that’s alright. She’ll be here all day and then some, squeezing, releasing, squeezing…]
[It comes suddenly. A few moments pass in silence, held; then, all at once, Sunny's head lifts, brow pulled up with exaggeration unbefitting of Sunny's usual features. He grips Aubrey's hand, steady.]
I don't...want to go back to sleep. [As if he fears he might; as if he fears he has no choice.] Let's...d-do...something...
[The early morning has slipped by; brighter rays peer through the leaves, dappling the wooden floor.
[Somnius isn’t always so welcoming, but today… today might be promising.]
We can… go for a walk. [It comes out a bit like a date offer. It isn’t not one.] I’ll show you where I train, and we can just… sightsee, and stuff. [No pressure. Sunny isn’t out too much; they can ease into it.]
[Just a walk. How many have they taken? A walk through a neighborhood park or to a hobby shop; a walk through tangled overgrowth and growling throats.
[It's just a walk. Sunny's perfectly capable of moving his legs. He and Aubrey's hands are still clasped together, so he takes hers and kisses it softly, just like he would a princess in his dreams.]
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no subject
I want to be with him.
K-kel too, but...
[He only grips Aubrey tighter.]
I can't...I can't... [Not now. Maybe not ever.] Just you...
no subject
[In ways, she can understand. However he hurt Mari, how he might hurt Basil—in anger; a mistake; he loves them. He loves them, and it’s harder for that.
[He’s not talking with Kel. Basil is… Basil. Any issues they have with that, they can take it to Aubrey....
[She pulls Sunny closer, tighter.]
Anything you want.
[Her fingers run through soft hair.]
I can talk to them....
no subject
[Sunny's mind is ever at war with itself. It's hard to know what's real, right, or wrong when you have no idea who you are or why it matters.
[Aubrey can talk to them; it's that or silence...
[He can't bear to so much as give her words to deliver. He merely nods, still clinging with all his meager strength.]
no subject
[Sunny has told her more than anyone should ever have to. Aubrey’s never had a problem speaking; found it too easy, if anything. But she can be careful with Sunny— maybe too careful—a knife gleaming in a sliver of moonlight, feet on the edge of a roof—
[It’s done. Aubrey’s a fool if she thinks she can control what he does, any of them; she only needs to be there before it gnaws him apart.
[She carries him. Doesn’t push. Somehow, that’s been enough.
[Lightly, Aubrey rests her chin over Sunny’s head, curling ever-protectively around him. His food’s cold; that’s alright. She’ll be here all day and then some, squeezing, releasing, squeezing…]
no subject
I don't...want to go back to sleep. [As if he fears he might; as if he fears he has no choice.] Let's...d-do...something...
[Anything...]
no subject
[The early morning has slipped by; brighter rays peer through the leaves, dappling the wooden floor.
[Somnius isn’t always so welcoming, but today… today might be promising.]
We can… go for a walk. [It comes out a bit like a date offer. It isn’t not one.] I’ll show you where I train, and we can just… sightsee, and stuff. [No pressure. Sunny isn’t out too much; they can ease into it.]
I’ll be right with you.
UGH we can wrap I'm dead
[It's just a walk. Sunny's perfectly capable of moving his legs. He and Aubrey's hands are still clasped together, so he takes hers and kisses it softly, just like he would a princess in his dreams.]
Okay...sweetheart.