[Why does he keep answering questions with other questions? He can't even come up with one good reason why he'd like to know him. Sunny gets it, but...]
"I am—yet what I am none cares or knows; My friends forsake me like a memory lost: I am the self-consumer of my woes— They rise and vanish in oblivious host, Like shadows in love’s frenzied stifled throes And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed
Into the nothingness of scorn and noise, Into the living sea of waking dreams, Where there is neither sense of life or joys, But the vast shipwreck of my life’s esteems; Even the dearest that I loved the best Are strange—nay, rather, stranger than the rest.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod A place where woman never smiled or wept There to abide with my Creator, God, And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept, Untroubling and untroubled where I lie The grass below—above the vaulted sky."
[Unexpected. This is a whole poem - the reverence for it apparent in the care of its reiteration. Coming from someone who only seemed capable of chat speak - he's somewhat impressed.]
It's a poignant take on human loneliness. I can see why you like it. There's a great deal of emotion in it.
[It's not uncommon to seek out sad content - the internet is full of advert filled sob stories and movies who master the art tend to garner fame through awards. It's a shared human experience that all can relate to.]
There's an appeal I can understand - sadness is an emotion that can elicit a strong reaction and people tend to seek those out. Is that why you enjoy them so much or is there another reason?
I have a hard time understanding the appeal of making it worse. Though I suppose it can be akin to the same sensation as morbid curiosity. Sometimes you can't help to wonder how far the depths of your feelings will go.
[Ah...Sunny fidgets in his seat, the tips of his toes tapping the floor. It's...hard to explain even without having to talk out loud; not a path Sunny's really sure that he ought to be going down...]
im not really sure havent u ever been sad so u listen to a sad song?
But I do often think about sadness and the meaning behind it. The different aspects of it and its purpose in human beings. It's quite a fun thought exercise. Philosophy has different takes on it that are fascinating.
[He does watch horror movies in the hopes of finding a jump scare that does something. The results are inconclusive and that's not befitting of his image enough to bring up.]
Brightens considerably. Coffee forgotten at the edge of a small table.]
It is. If you find yourself bored, you should read up on the topic.
In relation to sadness itself, there are some common misconceptions that it's to contrast what are primarily considered positive emotions - the idea of a counter experience.
Then there are those who place each emotion on its own scale. One such view is that sadness derives from our response to knowing we are not omnipotent and the human realization that there are things out of reach forever.
My apologies for rambling - this is only to say the topic is vast, despite being such a simple, common emotion.
[Sunny listens. He's a good listener. He types on his phone with a dedicated, focused expression. He's much quicker with his thumbs than he is his voice.]
don't apologize i like this a lot we know sometimes why we're sad but not what the point is or how to make it stop
we want to understand because then maybe we can find a cure for that feeling
that's what i think
[That's his attempt to match Akechi's length, but honestly, Sunny has a lot more to say than people realize. He just struggles to say it. Texting has helped that a lot. He doesn't feel worn out, or anxious. He can talk about philosophy if he wants, because he doesn't have to open his mouth. Sometimes he thinks that nobody realizes he's not stupid.]
[It's an interesting take - a curious question. The implication of depression present in the conversation that follows. He keeps it in mind, for now, and focuses on the single emotion itself. ]
It's curious, isn't it? If you follow the logic of some, sadness is a necessity for happiness. If you take one, the other exists in excess and becomes meaningless. To find a cure would negate joy in the long run.
Then if you abide by the existence of it being its own entity, and in speaking of our previous conversation -
You wanted to consume sad media to be sad. If sadness was gone, what feeling would you chase then?
Is more aware than he lets on. Happiness taken away, sadness a constant presence - an injustice with emotions. There's experience behind those words, obvious and apparent. Asking him why he feels that way is pointless.
Akechi takes a minute - ponders the text under his fingers.]
Those who wrote those pieces likely felt the same. They wanted someone to resonate with it. I wonder who among this town would resonate with something you created.
[Sunny's embarrassed - that's entertaining. He digs his heels into the topic.]
I've heard creative types are rarely happy with their own work. Of course, you're not obligated to do anything, but imagine if John Clare felt that way and never published a single item.
It's a matter of perspective, is all. Bad to one is good to another. Happiness to one is sadness to another.
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no subject
thats true
what
do u want to know?
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a poem?
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"I am—yet what I am none cares or knows;
My friends forsake me like a memory lost:
I am the self-consumer of my woes—
They rise and vanish in oblivious host,
Like shadows in love’s frenzied stifled throes
And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed
Into the nothingness of scorn and noise,
Into the living sea of waking dreams,
Where there is neither sense of life or joys,
But the vast shipwreck of my life’s esteems;
Even the dearest that I loved the best
Are strange—nay, rather, stranger than the rest.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie
The grass below—above the vaulted sky."
I Am!
John Clare
no subject
It's a poignant take on human loneliness. I can see why you like it. There's a great deal of emotion in it.
no subject
but i like it
sad poems
are some of the best
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There's an appeal I can understand - sadness is an emotion that can elicit a strong reaction and people tend to seek those out. Is that why you enjoy them so much or is there another reason?
no subject
i like the way
it can change how u feel
make it better
or worse
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it feels better
to feel worse
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im not
really sure
havent u ever
been sad
so u listen
to a sad song?
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But I do often think about sadness and the meaning behind it. The different aspects of it and its purpose in human beings. It's quite a fun thought exercise. Philosophy has different takes on it that are fascinating.
[He does watch horror movies in the hopes of finding a jump scare that does something. The results are inconclusive and that's not befitting of his image enough to bring up.]
no subject
philosophy
is cool
i think that would be
really interesting
no subject
Brightens considerably. Coffee forgotten at the edge of a small table.]
It is. If you find yourself bored, you should read up on the topic.
In relation to sadness itself, there are some common misconceptions that it's to contrast what are primarily considered positive emotions - the idea of a counter experience.
Then there are those who place each emotion on its own scale. One such view is that sadness derives from our response to knowing we are not omnipotent and the human realization that there are things out of reach forever.
My apologies for rambling - this is only to say the topic is vast, despite being such a simple, common emotion.
no subject
don't apologize
i like this a lot
we know sometimes
why we're sad
but not what the point is
or how to make it stop
we want to understand because then
maybe we can find a cure
for that feeling
that's
what i think
[That's his attempt to match Akechi's length, but honestly, Sunny has a lot more to say than people realize. He just struggles to say it. Texting has helped that a lot. He doesn't feel worn out, or anxious. He can talk about philosophy if he wants, because he doesn't have to open his mouth. Sometimes he thinks that nobody realizes he's not stupid.]
no subject
It's curious, isn't it? If you follow the logic of some, sadness is a necessity for happiness. If you take one, the other exists in excess and becomes meaningless. To find a cure would negate joy in the long run.
Then if you abide by the existence of it being its own entity, and in speaking of our previous conversation -
You wanted to consume sad media to be sad. If sadness was gone, what feeling would you chase then?
no subject
for what u said
at first
i think that happiness
can all be taken away
but i don't think
sadness can
[As for Akechi's question...]
i don't think
i chase sadness
but maybe
[Maybe...]
when i hear
or read
something sad
it feels like someone
understands
[And he doesn't feel so alone.]
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Is more aware than he lets on. Happiness taken away, sadness a constant presence - an injustice with emotions. There's experience behind those words, obvious and apparent. Asking him why he feels that way is pointless.
Akechi takes a minute - ponders the text under his fingers.]
Those who wrote those pieces likely felt the same. They wanted someone to resonate with it. I wonder who among this town would resonate with something you created.
Perhaps you should try it sometime.
no subject
i do write poems
but im bad at them
[He's not.]
couldnt show
anyone
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I've heard creative types are rarely happy with their own work. Of course, you're not obligated to do anything, but imagine if John Clare felt that way and never published a single item.
It's a matter of perspective, is all. Bad to one is good to another. Happiness to one is sadness to another.
no subject
[Sunny's quiet for a long moment. He considers not saying it, but...does.]
i dont want
anyone
to feel the way
i do
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