sadpoem | ic inbox for labyrinthum

[A gentle smile.] Not today.

[Small glance to her phone on the floor, pointing without letting go.] He understands.

[The briefest memory of fear - What did she tell him? - but it fades immediately. She wouldn't have told him anything. She won't. If she does, then...

[Well. He just trusts her. Completely. It's new...

[Sunny reaches up with one hand to take her face, the other still squeezing between their chests.]

Thank you...

[Not a thing. And unless Sunny wants otherwise, she never will.

[Maybe she’ll lose her loved ones’ trust for that. Maybe she already has.

[Sunny’s face is in her hand, and hers in his; their other hands squeeze, release.
[Aubrey decides she won’t apologize for anything.

[She kisses him, soft, sweet. Promising…]

[Soft, sweet, promising; everything about it feels so...very, very real. Like it's his first true day in this place. His mind doesn't wander, really. He can smell the air outside through an open window, hear the leaves above them rustling. He can see her - clear, perfect, vibrant, every pore and lash and microscopic quirk observed, absorbed.

["Are you even alive?"

[He wasn't...

[He is...

[How he's meant to feel about that, he doesn't know, but...

[He kisses her. He'd live to do it again...]

[He’s here. And he’ll be here, home, with her; a treehouse, a dream, a nightmare, a city of ghosts, a new reality. Wherever. For once, Aubrey doesn’t doubt it. They know so much about each other, and they’re still here....

[They’re alive.

[She kisses Sunny again; again, again. Soft, not desperate, not drowning. Has it ever felt quite like this? The now will slip away into the past, and there will be never be a morning quite like this again—and it’s alright, because it won’t end there, and it’s all precious. He is....

[When their lips part, her eyes are gleaming. Aubrey feels happy....]

I want to wake up with you… every day.

[It’s not a demand. He sleeps so much, normally. Just a hushed fantasy, comfortably longing.]

[Sunny's fingertips lightly flutter over Aubrey's jaw like he's playing a harp. He kisses her. He kisses her. He brushes their noses together, and it's better than any dream. Why keep sleeping?]

I'd...wake up...for you...

Heh… good. [Maybe a bit forward—there really is no pressure. But she can’t help herself.

[One more kiss, lightly pressing their noses, and then;]

What do you want to do today? [It’s all theirs.]

[Sunny's quiet, though he feels like he won't stay that way, which is odd. He takes Aubrey's hands in his, idly playing with her fingers. Right before he opens his mouth to talk, he takes her hand, squeezing, releasing...]

I'm...not sure what...to do now...

[He spends so much time in this house. It’s always a surprise when he’s not in it, though more often than not, he’s just with Kenma—or off having his adventures. Aubrey can’t pretend to know the details.

[She’d like to, though.

[A few ideas run through her head—squeezing, releasing—but there’s no point in overwhelming. They just woke up.]

For now… [A small hum, light.] …I can get you breakfast? [Eren’s delivery is probably at the door.

[Aubrey’s not moving before Sunny, though.]

[He could eat, he thinks.

[It feels wrong. He's thinking of Mari more than ever. He doesn't deserve to eat when she can't - that's really what it's come down to, all these years. Everything he tastes, he wonders what she'd think.

[Still - he could eat, he thinks.

[So, he nods, pushing himself up. He'll follow her.]

[It feels like they haven’t moved for hours, maybe longer. Still, Aubrey has her routine: up, stretch, door, delivery, kitchen… Lately she hasn’t been able to leave it out wherever he’s sleeping, lest the cat eat it.

[She’s got her hand on an upper cabinet, remembers it’s different today, and looks back over to Sunny. Wordlessly hands him the food, instead.]

[The way Aubrey jumps right into her routine, it's impossible not to notice what Sunny has, thus far, missed, too busy sleeping. Aubrey's cared for him. He knows that, but...he sees it in action now - feels it in every cell.

[She didn't run away. He told her the impossible, and she's still here. She knows. She doesn't hate him.

[He still believes he deserves to be hated, but...of course - of course - he's grateful that he's not.

[He takes the food, curling up on the couch with his legs tucked under himself. He eats. It has taste...

[How can he feel so light?

[He watches Aubrey, waiting for her to sit down too. The world is calm; sharp, but calm.]

It's good...

[Sunny curls up on the couch, and Aubrey joins him with some leftovers. She nods, chewing. It’s good to see him eating for himself. Omori usually takes care of that....

[It’s calm. The quiet is comfortable. Idly Aubrey scans the room, appreciating how the morning light dances about. Not every day she’s in here at this hour. It’s nice....

[His phone is in the corner. Her eyes linger there for a moment, and then she takes another forkful before the frown can settle. Later.]

[Sunny is more observant than people give him credit for - more perceptive. He sees where Aubrey's eyes linger, recalling at once what led to a much different conversation than he ever could have expected.

[Anxiety seizes his heart. Dropping his fork, he takes Aubrey's hand and squeezes it before he can stop himself.

[Basil...

[Sunny swallows with a dry throat. Aubrey's right here...]

B-basil...

[Sunny’s fork drops, and food is set aside immediately. Aubrey clasps his hand, watching him.

[“Back home…”

[She nods, squeezing, releasing, squeezing. Basil’s not here. Sunny can tell her what he wants her to know.]

[It's the opposite. His voice comes out weak, nearly pleading.]

Do...do you know?

[She pauses. Almost shakes her head, but;]

I don’t know what he said to you.

[Sunny cringes, looking not unlike he might get sick. He squeezes her hand.

[There's nothing left to hide, is there? Or is there...

[He thinks of his dreams - only flashes - Basil, bleeding, crushed, dismembered, headless...]

I hurt him. [Sunny's words are choked, but he isn't crying.] In...the future...maybe...

The...hospital...

[Aubrey leans forward, still squeezing, releasing…

[No one else is here. It feels like they’re sharing a secret anyway. Maybe Aubrey can’t get mad at them, when she’s about to…]

Kel… has told me about the future. [It feels like a lie, not to share how much. Only if Sunny wants to hear it....] I know it’s not just you.

[He doesn't want to hear it. He doesn't want to hear it. He never asked Kel to tell him about the future, because he couldn't picture a bright one, and now he knows that it's dark, dark, dark. He doesn't know exactly what Aubrey means, but--

[He doesn't want to know.

[He grips Aubrey's hand - tight.]

Please...

Tell me...

[It’s not fair.]

Everything…?

[It’s not goddamn fair.]

[Sunny feels a terrible, terrible weight settle back on his shoulders, even worse than that of the last four years. With one arm - the mangled one - he hugs himself, eyes dropping to his lap. He keeps hold of Aubrey's hand with the other.

[Everything...?

[How much does she know? Kel acted like everything was fine, but...

[He can only expect the worst. Kel might be a liar...

[Sunny nods; weak, miserable.]

Yes...

[All at once, she hates Kel, actually. Sunny’s trauma wasn’t his to tell. Maybe the same could be said for Basil, but that’s different—it’s always different, with Basil. Both of them—all of them, from points in time only days yet too far apart.

[It’s not their fault. They should have someone. Hell, Aubrey could’ve hounded them into telling, under different circumstances, but it’s happened the way it’s happened, and she hates this for Sunny, and—

[Sunny’s here. He agrees. It’s not fair to him to hold back.]

I know that… during the sleepover, you and Basil fight. [He’s not looking, and Aubrey’s expression has pulled tense with twisted, churning emotion. She speaks slow; has to force it.] Kel’s not sure why—neither of us are.

I know that puts you in the hospital; both of you. And in that future…

[She squeezes. Doesn’t release; but if Sunny does, then…]

…you tell us that Mari… didn’t kill herself. And that Basil covered for it.

[I’m sorry.]

[Sunny is quiet for a long moment. "You knew?" is certainly a question, though there's no use in asking for it. He isn't angry. He isn't...

[He squeezes her hand. Exactly two little tears drip between their legs, Sunny's head still hung; there's no sound to it, really.

[More silent moments pass. It might seem as though he's considering what to say, but it's not that. He can't think of anything to say until, quite simply - softly, softly:]

I don't hate him...

[He doesn't...]

I love him. [Sunny shakes his head; his body sways with it, nauseated.] It's not his fault...

[Mari. The hospital. None of it. Sunny made a mistake. Basil defended himself. That's it...]

[Sunny, Aubrey thinks, is a vastly more gracious person than she ever will be.

[There’s a jealous itch, despite it all. “My best friend.” She remembers last night, and it’s a balm; remembers what happens when she lets her ego block him out, period.

[He’s talking. Focus....
[He wailed so miserably.

[Aubrey reaches just one hand forward, brushing his cheek. She doesn’t make him look up.]

Alright....

[That’s all she has, for now. How he feels is his call.]

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THEY'LL STOP BEING DISGUSTING AT SOME POINT MAYBE lmk if u need more etc

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cw: eating issues discussed

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